Playing Favorites

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Sometimes the conflict we find ourselves facing in our families isn’t directly our fault. Instead, it’s the fault of somebody up the generational line from us who did some accidental tinkering along the way that resulted in things being where they are. One of the most potent sources of this accidental tinkering is when parents (or grandparents) play favorites with their children and grandchildren. This sets up the subsequent generations for all kinds of frustrating seasons of conflict. Let’s talk about how this can happen and what we need to do about it when it does.

Playing Favorites

Julie Andrews lent her voice to some of the most iconic movie songs ever. One that has always been among my favorites is “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music. In attempting to distract and reassure her nanny charges during a thunderstorm, she invites them to think about their favorite things. We all have favorite things. For instance, my favorite pie is pecan pie. (That’s not to be confused with pee-can pie or pee-cahn pie; those are different.) My favorite baseball team is the Kansas City Royals, who are in the midst of one of the most dramatic season turnarounds in baseball history. My favorite professional football team is the Kansas City Chiefs. I promise we will be magnanimous as we continue to outshine the Patriots’ dynasty in every way. College is all Kansas, of course. My favorite super spy is Ethan Hunt. My favorite drink is probably a cherry limeade from Sonic. My favorite book is probably still C.S. Lewis’ Mere Christianity, but his The Screwtape Letters would be a close second. Marvel is superior to D.C. Studios on the big screen in every way, and not even James Gunn will fix that. But in the animation department, D.C. owns everyone and it’s not close. 

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Digging in Deeper: Ephesians 6:12-13

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“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rules, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this darkness, against evil, spiritual forces in the heavens. For this reason take up the full armor of God, so that you may be able to resist in the evil day, and having prepared everything, to take your stand.” (CSB – Read the chapter)

A few months ago, several college campuses were roiled by protest movements that were anti-Israel, pro-Palestine, and sometimes even pro-Hamas. While the subject of the protests was undoubtedly a serious matter, one of the most humorous and frustrating things about these movements was that a number of the people who got caught up in them didn’t really know what they were protesting about. Somebody just said, “We’re protesting,” and they cluelessly showed up. In not really understanding the objective of the protest, they didn’t understand who their enemy was supposed to be. This left them vulnerable to all kinds of deserved mocking from folks who didn’t support them. If we don’t know who our real enemy is, it’s easy to get all caught up in fighting and lose sight of what our reason was in the first place. For the last several months I have slowly been watching through the series, Star Wars: Clone War. The series has been immensely enjoyable. Along the way, one theme has risen to the top in terms of a Gospel connection in the story. Let’s talk about Clone Wars, the Gospel, and fighting the right enemies.

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Morning Musing: Exodus 32:15-16

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“Then Moses turned and went down the mountain with the two tablets of the testimony in his hands. They were inscribed on both sides – inscribed front and back. The tablets were the work of God, and the writing was God’s writing, engraved on the tablets.” (CSB – Read the chapter)

All the words of the Scriptures matter. If we are going to understand them properly, that’s a pretty fundamental point for interpretation. The apostle Paul made as much clear when he said that every word of the Scriptures was breathed out by God. Our lack of understanding of some of them doesn’t mean they don’t matter. It means we don’t understand them. Interludes like this one often seem out of place as they interrupt the flow of the larger story in which they sit. Let’s talk about why this bit got included here.

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Digging in Deeper: Exodus 32:11-14

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“But Moses sought the favor of the Lord his God: ‘Lord, why does your anger burn against your people you brought out of the land of Egypt with great power and a strong hand? Why should the Egyptians say, “He brought them out with an evil intent to kill them in the mountains and eliminate them from the face of the earth”? Turn from your fierce anger and relent concerning this disaster planned for your people. Remember your servants Abraham, Isaac, and Israel – you swore to them by yourself and declared, “I will make your offspring as numerous as the stars of the sky and will give your offspring all this land that I have promised, and they will inherit it forever.”‘ So the Lord relented concerning the disaster he had said he would bring on his people.” (CSB – Read the chapter)

Have you ever prayed for someone else? I suspect you have. Nearly everyone has. That motion of spiritually looking up is hardwired into our programming. It takes real effort over time to turn it off. So, let me phrase that slightly differently. Have you ever interceded for someone else in prayer? This goes a little ways beyond merely praying for them. It’s easy to say a quick prayer for someone who is hurting and then go on about the rest of your day. Interceding is when we stand in the gap between them and God and make ourselves a passionate advocate for their interests. When God was ready to bring apocalyptic judgment against Israel because of their sin, Moses interceded for them. Let’s talk about what we see unfolding here.

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Digging in Deeper: Exodus 32:7-10

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“The Lord spoke to Moses, ‘Go down at once! For your people you brought up from the land of Egypt have acted corruptly. They have quickly turned from the way I commanded them; they have made for themselves an image of a calf. They have bowed down to it, sacrificed to it, and said, “Israel, these are your gods who brought you up from the land of Egypt.”‘ The Lord also said to Moses, ‘I have seen this people, and they are indeed a stiff-necked people. Now leave me alone, so that my anger can burn against them and I can destroy them. Then I will make you into a great nation.'” (CSB – Read the chapter)

Have you ever known someone who liked to play the Devil’s advocate in a debate setting? Are you that person? Some people just like taking the other side in a debate. Even if they don’t really believe in the position, they’ll stake it out simply because they like arguing. I bring that up because this next part of our story is hard to understand. All the players switch roles in ways that are confusing at best. If we are not sufficiently grounded in our understanding of their character outside of this story, we are going to struggle to make any positive sense out of it. Let’s take a look at God’s getting angry with Israel.

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