This week we are moving forward in our series, A Kingdom Vision, walking through Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. We have finished Matthew 5, and it’s time to move forward into Matthew 6. Jesus opens this next part of the sermon by talking about three different spiritual practices. He gives lot of practical advice in terms of how to pursue them in ways that will be the most lastingly beneficial to us, but it’s the bigger picture that we simply must not ignore. And the big picture is this: the reason we pursue these disciplines matters. A lot. Let’s talk about it.

Growth in Secret Places

I love weeks like we had last week. I love hearing about camp and all that the youth and kids experienced and that God accomplished during those weeks. I have thoroughly enjoyed all the years I have chaperoned as well. I think the reason I love church camp so much is that a church camp was the source of my first real job out of high school, my wife, all three of my boys, and my call into ministry. How could I not be grateful for camp? And, yes, you heard that right: my marriage is a product of a camp romance. 

It took us a little while to figure that out. Well, that’s not entirely true. I was hooked from the first time I laid eyes on her. It took her a little bit longer to figure it out, but not too much longer. Of course, neither of us knew the other had figured it out for weeks. The biggest reason for this was the strict no-staff-dating-staff policy at the camp. So, we didn’t say anything. To anyone. Almost all summer. But we did eat breakfast together almost every morning all summer. No one could fuss at us about that if we happened to be the first two staffers at breakfast. Every. Single. Morning. And we caught up about how our days had gone in the afternoons when nothing else was going on. There was nothing out of bounds about that. 

By the end of the summer, when one of the other staff members had thrown caution to the wind and played matchmaker like we were in middle school, we decided to give what would be a long distance relationship a shot. I still remember having that conversation. We hadn’t done anything big or dramatic. Just a whole bunch of little things that nobody saw that resulted in a relationship that almost 22 years later is still growing. This morning, I want to talk with you about the kind of secret things that grow a good relationship. 

Today finds us in the fourth part of our summer teaching series, A Kingdom Vision. All this summer we are working our way through Jesus’ most famous sermon, the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5-7. Each week we are diving into another part of what Jesus had to say here, seeking to understand each part on its own terms, but also working to see how Jesus wasn’t just teaching for the sake of teaching. He was offering us a pretty comprehensive vision of what the kingdom of God is going to be like both when we experience it in part now, and one day when the full and final kingdom arrives. 

Over the first three stops on our journey, we worked through Matthew 5. Out of the gate Jesus began by talking about the blessings that will be available to those who are willing to adjust their lives to dwell in God’s kingdom instead of the various kingdoms of this world. These blessings, though, aren’t intended to be merely perks for insiders. They are intended to be gifts that we in turn give to those around us, letting God’s love flow through us rather than keeping it all for ourselves. Or, as we put it then, the blessings of living God’s way aren’t just for us. 

In the second week, Jesus introduced us to the high standards of God’s kingdom. In order to dwell in God’s kingdom, we have to meet the standards of His righteousness, and those standards are very high indeed. They are high enough so as to make any thought that we are capable of keeping them on our own delusional. Your efforts to make yourself right with God aren’t enough. And just to drive home the point, the following week, we saw Jesus double down on this point by walking through six different areas we are tempted to pat ourselves on the back for being good enough for God but in which we nonetheless fall woefully short of His righteousness. What all of this means is that our options for getting right with God are incredibly limited. God’s high standards mean grace is our only option. But far from being bad news, that’s the best news there could possibly be because grace means absolutely anyone can be reconciled with Him if they are only willing to receive His grace. We can all enjoy the fruits of His righteousness by putting our faith in Jesus. 

So, Jesus has been talking a lot about righteousness so far. Specifically, He has been talking about how God’s righteousness is beyond ours. The standard of His righteousness is beyond our ability to meet it on our own. People react to this fact in several different ways. Some just throw up their hands and try to get by with not worrying about it at all, and just living their lives however they please. That sounds like a good idea at first, but is quickly revealed to be not nearly as good of an idea as it seems out of the gate. Other folks respond by doubling down on their commitment to self-righteousness, convinced they can be good enough for God if they’ll just try harder. These folks quickly become miserable and miserable to be around. Still others throw themselves on the mercy and grace of God in Christ Jesus like we were talking about a couple of weeks ago. 

Then there are the folks who want all the accolades of righteousness but without necessarily having to bother with all the hassle of living with it on a day-to-day basis. They think putting on a show of righteousness will be good enough. If they can fool the people around them, then maybe they can even fool God too. After all, He’s just looking for us to check some boxes, right? He doesn’t really care what’s happening below the surface, does He? It is to this last group of folks that Jesus seems to be directing what He has to say next in the Sermon on the Mount. If you have your copy of the Scriptures handy, join me in Matthew 6, and let’s keep rolling on our journey with Jesus. 

Immediately after telling us that we need to be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect, Jesus does an about face and says, “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. Otherwise, you will have no reward with your Father in heaven.” The way Jesus seems to switch gears sometimes is almost enough to give you whiplash. He went from declaring that our righteousness has to be absolutely off the charts in one breath to telling us not to let anybody see us practicing it in the next. And His reasoning for this is really interesting. Look at that again: “Otherwise, you will have no reward with your Father in heaven.” I thought the point of righteousness was to gain the rewards of our Father in heaven? It is—well, there are other points to it as well, but gaining kingdom rewards is at least one of the points—but sometimes we get confused as to what rewards we are really seeking and from whom in our practice of righteousness. And if we forget and play to the wrong audience, we won’t be all that impressive to the one whose attention we really want to gain. 

But here’s the thing, it’s harder than you might expect to direct our efforts at righteousness toward the right audience. To help us get our hearts and minds wrapped around this, Jesus gives us some examples of common spiritual practices that have all the potential of growing us in righteousness and thus growing our relationship with God which also all have the potential of getting pointed in the wrong direction. 

He starts with the spiritual discipline of giving. Because of just how easily our stuff can grab hold of our heart, sacrificially giving away our stuff on a regular and intentional basis is absolutely essential to growing and deepening our faith in Jesus. Yet as significant of a spiritual practice as giving is in terms of growing and developing our relationship with Jesus, it is also a practice that can become very public and gain us quite a lot of accolades from others if we want that. And, if we’re being really honest, being celebrated by other people for being such a kind and generous and faithful person feels pretty good. Get very much hype like that, and you’ll find yourself starting to believe the things your cheering section is saying about you. And when that happens, it’s a short trip to starting to do things in order to keep that praise coming. All of a sudden, what perhaps started as an intentionally pursued spiritual discipline morphs into something that’s a whole lot more about self-righteousness than growing in God’s kingdom righteousness. 

Listen to this: “So whenever you give to the poor, don’t sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be applauded by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you give to the poor [and notice Jesus said when there, not if; that we are practicing the spiritual discipline of sacrificial generosity isn’t in question, but rather our motives for doing it], don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” And, just so this is clear, we’re not given any indication of how God will reward us for our practice of righteousness in secret, only that He will. 

Well, if giving is a spiritual discipline that is sometimes pursued in ways that people know what we are doing, prayer is much more commonly pursued in this way. Accordingly, this is the next place Jesus goes. As we look at this, see if you can spot the similarities with the last section. “Whenever you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, because they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you pray, go into your private room, shut your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you. When you pray, don’t babble like the Gentiles, since they imagine they’ll be heard for their many words. Don’t be like them, because your Father knows the things you need before you ask him.” 

Now, there is obviously a ton of wisdom about praying contained in these words. We could spend a whole sermon unpacking what Jesus has to say here and how it should shape our prayer life, but let’s stay focused on the big picture for now. What’s Jesus saying here? Isn’t He saying about the same thing He was saying in the last section, but with a different spiritual practice as His focus? 

How many times have you thought, “Wow! That person is such a good prayer. I wish I could pray like him.” How many times when you have been asked to pray have you deferred to someone else, “because she’s so much better at praying in public than I am.” Have you ever been the person other people thought prayed really well? Do you know what often results in someone being praised for how good they are at praying? They speak with confidence when they pray in public, and they use either big words or many words or both. That’s it. Now, perhaps their praying really is Spirit-filled and genuinely encouraging and uplifting to the people who were actually tuned in and listening to what they were saying rather than letting their minds wander to all sorts of other things as the prayer droned on, but if the prayer included fancy words or at least a multiplicity of words most people are going to be impressed anyway. 

Well, listen, when people start getting impressed with your prayer skills, do you know who you start subtly trying to impress with your praying? I’ll give you a hint: It’s not God. And, if you are someone who constantly idolizes another person who prays so much better than you do, do you know what spiritual discipline you are probably not really very focused on growing in to the betterment of your personal relationship with Jesus? I’ll give you a hint: It’s prayer. 

Prayer can be pursued publicly. There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, praying publicly is a good way to teach others to pray. But prayer is primarily about your own personal relationship with God. When you are growing a friendship with another person, you sometimes talk to that person in private, and you sometimes talk to that person in public. Yet while there are probably some topics you won’t discuss in public that you will in private, you are nonetheless talking to your friend in both settings. You aren’t trying to impress other people, and you aren’t getting discouraged by other people. You’re just talking to your friend. Prayer should first and foremost be like that. It’s just a simple conversation with a friend. 

To help us get our minds wrapped even a little more fully around this, Jesus goes on to give us a model prayer. “Therefore, you should pray like this: Our Father in heaven, your name be honored as holy. Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors [don’t miss the verb tense there because it’s pretty important—our forgiveness of others is the one condition Jesus consistently puts on God’s forgiveness of our own sins as we will see in just a second]. And do not bring us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.” 

This is both a sample prayer we can pray, but also a model for our praying that should serve as a jumping off point into more and deeper conversations with God. Think of it as one of those conversation starter cards you sometimes see for sale in nicknack stores. And, as before, there is so much we could say about this prayer. Whole books have been written about it, but we just don’t have time for all of that this morning. We’ll satisfy ourselves only with the one bit of commentary Jesus Himself added to His model. “For if you forgive others their offenses, your heavenly Father will forgive you as well. But if you don’t forgive others, your Father will not forgive your offenses.” And, yes, that is just as uncomfortable of an idea as it sounds. 

From here, Jesus shifts gears to one more spiritual practice that was very common in His day, but which our particular faith tradition doesn’t do nearly as much with today as others do. And again here, listen for the similarities to what He has already said. “Whenver you fast, don’t be gloomy like the hypocrites. For they make their faces unattractive so that their fasting is obvious to people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that your fasting isn’t obvious to others but to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” 

Fasting is simply the act of giving something up that is a normal part of your routine for the purpose of giving the attention you would normally have given to that to pursuing a deeper and richer relationship with God through the various other spiritual disciplines. Yes, fasting is typically focused on food, but it doesn’t have to be. You could fast from just about anything. The goal is to find something that is a normal part of your daily rhythm and replace it with a spiritual practice like prayer or studying the Scriptures. 

Jesus’ point about fasting here is just what it has been about the previous two things. It should be between you and God. If you give up something for Lent, for example—a traditional season of fasting over the forty days before Easter—nobody should know about it except God and possibly an accountability partner who is committed to helping you keep on track. You definitely shouldn’t ever announce your fast on social media. That would be a pretty direct transgression of what Jesus is saying here. Fasting is meant to grow your relationship with God, not make other people more impressed with how spiritual and righteous you are. 

There are other spiritual disciplines Jesus could have chosen to give His attention to here, but He chose these three on purpose. They were the most common spiritual practices in His day by which people pursued the outworking of their relationship with God. With the possible exception of fasting, they still are today. And although there is still much to unpack in terms of what Jesus had to say about them individually, think with me for a second about the themes that have emerged in the text here. 

Three really stand out to me. First, what did Jesus say about people who pursue these disciplines publicly, making a big show out of their efforts at righteousness? He said they have received their reward. The public accolades they get are all they are going to get out of them. They won’t get and shouldn’t expect any kind of spiritual benefits from God for their efforts. When the goal of our spiritual practices is show rather than substance, then the show is all we are going to get. Maybe that’ll feel good for a while, but you can’t perform long on an empty stomach. You can’t maintain the mirage of righteousness long with an empty spirit. 

This brings me to the second thing that really catches my eye here. Jesus gave a label to people who pursue spiritual disciplines publicly and for the sake of the social credits they think they will receive for being known for their righteousness. Did you catch what it was? Hypocrite. In each example here Jesus told us to not be like the hypocrites who do these things just for the show. A hypocrite is someone who says or encourages one thing, but then behaves in a manner inconsistent or even simply at odds with what he says. Well, these folks who are pursuing righteousness for the sake of the show they can put on and the public celebration they can get for it are hypocrites. They are encouraging people on toward righteousness and habits that will grow their relationship with God, but they are doing just the opposite. 

Everybody hates hypocrites for a reason. If your righteousness is mostly performative, you are being a hypocrite. If you talk a mean game of faith when you are around church people, but aren’t really addressing the rot of sin in your heart or that one sinful habit you just can’t seem to break, you are being a hypocrite. If you are more likely to share or repost a biblical meme than you are to open your Bible, you are being a hypocrite. The likes and applause you get for those efforts are all you should expect to receive for them. Benefits from God will not be forthcoming. 

What we need to do instead is what the last thing we see repeated here points us toward. After Jesus calls us to a better shape of the practice, one that happens mostly in secret between just us and God, what does He say about God’s response to our efforts? Your Father who sees in secret will reward you. When you are pursuing the various spiritual disciplines for the sole purpose of growing your relationship with God in Christ, that’s when you are going to see that growth start to happen. When you are humbly seeking Christ and Christ alone in ways and at times that no one else is aware except perhaps to see the fruit coming to bear in your life later, that’s when you are going to receive and experience the rewards God has in mind for you. When your goal is for nothing more than to bring glory to God in Christ through your life regardless of whether or not anybody is aware of your commitment, that’s when you are going to start really and truly seeing upward movement happen in your relationship with God. Growing a good relationship with God happens when nobody is looking. 

Listen: if the only places you really pursue the kinds of spiritual disciplines that have the potential to grow your relationship with God are in public, you’re not really growing that relationship in any meaningful way. If the only times that Lisa and I had spent together that summer at camp had been when all the kids were around, or at least when all the other staff members were around, we probably wouldn’t be where we are today. Growing strong relationships doesn’t happen in public. It happens when no one else is paying attention. It happens when you go out of your way to give and spend time you don’t really have in pursuit of a goal that’s more important to you than what you are giving up to get it. It happens when you are intentional and consistent in the little things. It happens one day at a time. This is true about our relationships with people, and it’s true about our relationship with God. Growing a good relationship with God happens when nobody is looking. 

This doesn’t mean that what happens within these four walls on a Sunday morning doesn’t matter. It doesn’t mean your commitment to serve as God has gifted you isn’t still enormously significant. It doesn’t mean you now have a built-in pass to avoid ever praying on stage or singing in the choir. It doesn’t mean that showing up for Bible study and Sunday school aren’t essential to your spiritual growth and development. It doesn’t mean any of that. But it does mean that none of those things and others like them are ever going to be the most significant contributing factors to your becoming more fully who God made you to be, a fitting reflection of His perfect righteousness in Christ. Those things will all happen when nobody is looking. Growing a good relationship with God happens when nobody is looking. 

So, what does that look like? It looks like being intentional about carving time out of each day when you can be in the Scriptures without any distractions. Now, I don’t know what that looks like for you, but if I don’t do it early, it’s probably not going to happen. And while I do use my Bible app as my primary source for engagement, the potential for distraction there is enormous. Using an analog copy is not a bad idea. 

It looks like developing the spiritual practice of praying throughout your day such that you almost have a running commentary between you and God going on all the time. This can happen just in your head between you and Him. It can be out loud, although you should probably wait on the out loud conversations until you are mostly by yourself—unless you have earbuds in. If you have earbuds in, you can say whatever you want, and nobody will pay attention to you. But as much as this stream-of-consciousness type of praying matters, it also looks like your setting aside some intentional time to spend in focused prayer each day. Maybe this is only a few minutes at first with the goal in mind to see it grow over time, but the intentionality is the key. 

It looks like committing to the discipline of sacrificial generosity, but never in ways that draw attention to yourself. It looks like participating in worship with joy and gladness, but entirely unconscious of the people around you, not in the sense that you could potentially be distracting them, but in that their assessment of your singing, your posture, your appearance simply aren’t the most significant factors you are considering. It looks like lots of things. But mostly it looks like your getting with God in secret and pursuing a growing relationship with Him. Growing a good relationship with God happens when nobody is looking. 

So then, what are you doing when no one is looking? Are you pursuing Christ and Christ alone, or something or someone else? If your only pursuit of Christ happens when everyone is looking, you aren’t really pursuing Christ at all and you shouldn’t expect to find Him. But when you are putting in the effort when nobody is looking, that’s where the real magic will happen. Growing a good relationship with God happens when nobody is looking. So, find a secret place, and get to work.